Tikhtak

Cockney Cash Machines on the tidy n Neat!

Would you "Adam and Eve" it but finally the "Rabbit" they do on the "Tidy and neat" in the East End is  being given a literary status. A number of cash machines, according to a Timesonlione article(Thanks to Katherine Elizabeth for picking this up in the States), are dishing out "Moolah" with on-screen instructions in Cockney. “Readin’ your bladder of lard”, read the message on the screen. It asked for his “Huckleberry Finn”. Then more bewildering questions: did he want to see his balance on the Charlie Sheen? Did he wish to change his Huckleberry Finn or did he simply require sausage and mash, with or without a receipt?

Apparently 'Bank Machine', which runs 2,500 ATMs across the country, are thinking of extending this to cover Geordies, Brummies, Scouse and Scots. One comment was made that, The Yorkshire version is similar, but doesn't have an option to withdraw cash. I think they should do this on our local new channels too. So when Hugh Johns hands us over to our regional news  Riz Latif comes on saying "Alright me ol China's, did ya "Steak and Kidney pies" get a Butchers  hook" at this today?

Apart from feeling the freedom of having finished my MA, I have been moved to blog about this because I use to use Cockney rhyming slang to teach English. I would get Japanese students to learn some Cockney  slang phrases and then give them a piece of "written English" to translate into Cockney. They would then attempt to read it out authentically and we would even act out little scenes of using cockney speak... Just think that if ever those students come across those machines today, those lessons some 10 years ago would have been worth it!

Uses for a Church building, Any ideas?

At the moment I suspect this is a big question for many churches. We have a service on Sunday then for the rest of the week we have an empty building? Perhaps some churches rent out rooms and halls to other groups ( at no small cost.) but essentially the main church building is derelict for 6 days.

Well the Church of England, with the help of the government, have today published guidelines for churches to help them access funding to open their buildings for community use. It seems that even the secular world sees the potential of these historic buildings and the unique way they are run. It is a bit ironic that while Christians are desperately looking for ways to get out of the building to reach out to the community, It seems the community have had enough of waiting and have decided to come on in.

This has extra resonance at present as my church at holy Trinity Clapham, has been undergoing a long consultation process with the church congregation to see how the building might be used, in the light of a major building project. I am not sure of the outcome but I know that there has been a distinct shortage of ideas.

Check out Dave Walker's cartoon take on this and how the Telegraph and George pitcher consider bringing health surgeries and post offices into the church... It seems if the church doesn't have any ideas the local high street will. Then again  I am always in need of a stamp on Sunday!

Custard Pie on Mandy's face

I thought I would link to this little video clip of a Miss Leila Deen putting a custard pie into Peter Mendelson's face  as a protest against his stance on climate change and especially being in favour of the third runway at heathrow. It is interesteing that there seems to be absolutely no security around him and the women then simply just walks off to be interviewed by ITV, hummmm! You can find out a bit more about the incident here

Set the Captives Free

Today I worked at the Christian Resources Exhibition for CMS, with the help of a replica brothel. I have to say it was a very powerful way to highlight the issue of the human trafficking for the sex trade, CMS's campaign for the summer called "Setting the Captives Free". Hasna Khatun (in red left) and Anjali Guptara (below) did a great job in taking on the character of an Indian prostitute and highlighting the real terror of being a slave in a caged brothel in Puna, India. Many people watched in amazement and were drawn to tears by the end in listening to their stories. My job was then made easy just asking people to commit to pray for the situation and sign up to recieve literature about it. The picture above also includes Sunetra Sarker of channel 4's no Angels who came to support the campaign on Tuesday. CMS are wanting to get behind a project to provide Creche facilities for the children of the prostitues who normally stay under their beds during work time and to fund a project in Bangledesh helping women who return (often by running away) from the Indian brothels to often a community who casts them aside. click on Set the Captives Free for more pictures and information about this CMS campaign.